39.

I could tell you don’t care how old I am turning today, and for the most part that would be true. There are people I know that are older and younger than me that have done things I wanted to do my whole life and have not done things I did decades ago.

It isn’t old, it isn’t quite as young as it used to be.

I could tell you stories about not thinking I would live past just about any number that ends in teen and they would make you a little weepy, but they were twenty years ago, I am here and the stories are just that, stories of a thing that never ended up happening.

I have been married, divorced, widowed.

I have three reminders of perfection I get to look at and love every day for the rest of my life.

I have been to other countries, but not the biggest city in the state I live in.

I love with all of my heart, for good or bad, Always and Forever. Why love any other way?

I see the world through rose-colored glasses from a time I never lived in that I am told I occasionally personify.

I listen to the music my parents grew up with, I listen to Norwegian Doom Metal, Hollywood Musicals, and Israeli love songs.

I can look at my arms and see scars that remind me why I am alive, and a few on why I shouldn’t be at all.

I am very aware this is taking on a Baz Luhrmann direction, and maybe that is okay.

Maybe I have some advice for people that would make sense to them.

Maybe I can say things that will ring that weird bell we all have within that resonates when we hear truth.

It doesn’t matter if you don’t own a house, home is a place where you are, no matter how much you pay for it.

Sing. For Goddess sake. Sing. Let them judge you, who cares? If you feel it, do it.

Vaccinate your fucking children. Don’t let them die because Facebook told you too.

Maybe not dance though, you can physically hurt yourself if you try to do a thing you shouldn’t do.

Don’t do anything people tell you to do because you hope they will like you more.

They won’t. They never, ever, will.

Help your friends. Help them whether you can give them exactly what they want or not. A listening ear is a thousand times better than a cold shoulder.

Cut. Out. Toxic. People. They are a wound that will never heal if you leave them where they are because of memories and old victories.

Tell people you love them. Every day. In words. In actions and deeds. They can never be told enough.

Read. Write. Paint. Sculpt. Game. let the voices within show themselves to the world.

Have a Tribe. Those people so close to you that to be without them is to be without a limb.

Love Your Tribe fiercely.

Listen to your Tribe’s women, they are wiser then you can possibly imagine with secrets of creation only they bear.

There are ten times ten thousand things in life you will love. Ten times more than that, you will regret. You need to focus on the things you loved, not the things you have lost. You can love without destroying yourself utterly.

Listen.

She speaks.

Listen.

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