Gentle Bear

Let’s Chat, Shall We?

There are a lot of buttons you can push on me and I will get angry nearly instantaneously. Some of them as trifling as whether the taste of one whiskey is better than the other. I know I need to work on this and I thank the people who bring it to my attention that I am being a pedantic asshole over things. I do.

Then there are the things that are fundamental to who I am as a human being. Those I can not let go.

Most days I would start this by apologizing in advance, trigger warnings, all sorts of things. No. Not now. If you are offended by the things I say and the ways in which I say them, that is on you to resolve, not me. It is not my, or any other human being’s job to control our language to spare your feelings, thoughts, and beliefs a little bump in the hallway.

That being said, let us get the things begun that I wish to begin, yes?

I am a polyamorous person. If you ignore the horrors of the root words incestuous Greek and Latin split root words, you will find it means many and love. In the modern context, it means a lot of things, but to me, it means that I am emotionally and physically capable and desirous of multiple romantic partners, not even necessary sexual mind you, remember that word, sexual, it becomes very important here in a little bit.

I am not greedy, overreaching, a manipulator, a cheater, or any combinations of synonyms that can be attributed to those things. I am OPEN and HONEST in my communication with the partners I have. I do not sneak off to places and have dirty little fucking secrets, literally or metaphorically in this case. The person I am seeing, if they have another partner, they know about me, they might not understand all of it, agree with all of it, or even participate in finding a secondary partner themselves, but they are aware of my existence and my relationship with their partner.

I will not get into the sociological aspect of it, I know I am not educated enough to do so. However, for you Jesus folk, come on over and sit with me a sec, let me tell you a thing.

I don’t care. I haven’t cared about the bible in more years than some of you have been alive and I sure as hell am not going to get lectured by someone who read a meme on a website and thinks they have the moral high ground.

I have already rid my immediate surroundings of most of you, but if I catch you speaking about my children again in any context I will happily go back to prison where I can read for the rest of my life knowing you won’t be able to spout bullshit like a fountain. So you close your mouth about what you don’t understand and I will turn my back and ignore the fact you exist.

NO, I am not saying polyamory is the ONLY way to go. The word CHOOSE is important here, isn’t it? If it is not for you, I will gladly respect that and wish you the best with your one, or even no partner. I am not “converting” people to my cause. I am trying to make people understand that it is MY choice, that’s all.

Let’s keep going, shall we?

You same people who spout on and on about Bible verses you think you know are the same people who tell me that my children wouldn’t have autism if I didn’t vaccinate them.

Of yes, you said precisely that.

Firstly, I will not listen to the “science” you have as it is not only wrong and easily refuted, it is dangerous and life-threatening. Secondly, you read a thing on a blog. Which, I am guessing is where YOU went to get the decade-plus of education that my son’s pediatrician did? You have seen life and death both in your multiple trips to Susan’s Facebook post?

Lastly…Oh yes lastly.

Your logic tells the world that you would rather have a child that is more likely to die incredibly young from preventable diseases than to have them be autistic. In other words, Autism is a fate worse than death in your opinion.

I am not the world’s best father. I know that. I have multiple weak points that I face EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I love my children more than anything, as a matter of fact, you probably love yours just as much.

The difference is that while I may have two autistic children, I do not see them as you do. I see a smile that will melt your frozen fucking heart in half and a little boy who can sing more gangster rap songs than I can. I see a boy who tries every day to do things doctors keep telling me he can’t and a little dude that loves hugging random people because he knows it makes them fucking happy.

So they should just be dead? They should have been allowed to contract the diseases you and your kind are allowing to come back after being ERADICATED in this country? I should have just, what, shipped them away and tried again? You ignorant and uppity fuck.

This concludes my motherfucking TED Talk.


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