Now that I suppose I am a little more awake than I was, I can write something a little more cohesive, or at least something that doesn’t upset me as much to read as the tripe I just put out does. I am leaving it up on purpose to remind me that maybe I should finish the coffee and let the caffeine kick in before I make the world aware of the things that are going on in the squishy thing inside of my melon on top of my neck-stick. Or, at least write about things I will remember writing a few minutes after the fact.
All that being said, we move on.
I have had these wildly fluctuating mood swings lately. I am sure part of it is all internal chemistry, of course, can’t escape dopamine and serotonin after all. Some of it though, some of it is because there is a sameness to everything that is so very old. It’s like looking at the patina on a piece of antique metal and thinking it a beautiful thing, until you realize that it had to sit there, untouched and abandoned, for years to get the colors you are so enthralled with. It needed to simply, not.
There is no plan on breaking the health officials dire warnings and going out for the sake of going out, I am bored, not suicidal. I just need to write about it, get it out of my head in some ways so that maybe something creative can grow in the place where this thing is beginning to fester and rot.
I love my children with all I am, but no one should see anyone for twenty hours a day, seven days a week, for X amount of weeks on end. School breaks it up, my sparse and yet delightful social calendar breaks it up, hell even doctor appointments make enough of a shift in things that I can say it is not the sameness.
I am a very touch-based person. To call me a hugger is quite an understatement. I am a light you off your feet and spin you around and have your blush because I did it kind of a hugger. I hold hands and like people to sit in my lap and only some of that is in the creepy and perverted way you are thinking of. Touchstones are a thing I have in my room here, literal and metaphorical touchstones. Lots of hippie things can be said here and it deserves a little more awake me than what is currently present, so we will leave this here with a pin it and come back to it another time and I will explain that a little better than I just did.
There, that is a little better.
Now, to try and be social and try to find things to talk about.
Loves and Rawrz Bitches
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