He would have been 74 today.
No one I talk to outside of blood at this point in my life ever knew, or even met my father. There are a few people out there in the aether that knew and even loved him, and I wish them the best in their journeys in life. Some times people simply fall away from one another because life happens and while it is sad sometimes, it is the way it needs to be for change to happen and for growth to occur, or some shit like that anyway.
That is the extent on the conversation on my father, I will not go to that well over and over knowing that the water is poison, so I will l let it sit there and fester, away from me this time instead of buried deep.
I have been pretty quiet lately, I have wanted to say so many things about so many things, but my brain seems to want to do things contrary to what I seem to want to do. I have a few moments of clarity so I will at least write down a few thoughts and expound upon them when I think I can as opposed to just writing half-ass shit.
In regards to the recent legislation stripping women of their reproductive rights and bodily autonomy:
Firstly, and I think this is the root of the matter, I am a male-bodied person and can and will never understand the vastly complex issues that female-bodied persons go through each and every day. Also, as a male-bodied person, I have no right to decide, in any capacity, what female-bodied persons should do and should not do with their bodies. I will stand with the female-bodied people I know and fight with them to regain the rights that theynever should have lost in the first place. I will not “mansplain”, assume I know what is better, lock them out of any discussions or any other kind of toxic exclusionary behaviors that denigrate and degrade their place as the foundation and pillar of society.
Added on to this, I will check to make sure that I watch what the fuck comes out of my mouth so that I as an individual do not do anything to abuse, assault, waylay, injure or remove their importance and stature in the construct of my day to day life. I will fail occasionally and when I do I will apologize yes, but more importantly, I will learn from my bad behaviors and make positive change so that I can show that I am indeed trying to make strides to be a better human being in all the ways I can be.
I have a great deal of anger in regards to this and I sincerely hope that I can communicate my thoughts effectively and try not to be in the spotlight as opposed to supporting those who are in it.
In regards to politics in general:
I will happily debate you in any and all topics of conversation and hopefully, come to a meeting of the mids with you if you follow a simple rule.
Denounce the fascist in the White House publicly.
I am not asking you to vote Democrat, to put bumper stickers on your car, to do anything at all other than say that the person we have as the leader of our country is unfit to lead. If we can agree on that I can guarantee we can make inroads on other subjects as well.
In regards to those who suffer from mental health issues, myself included:
Know I love you, each and every one of you. I have not lived your story, even if we may have some pages that overlap in the chapters. I love you because I too understand what it is like to be demeaned and accosted for things that are sometimes beyond our control, and sometimes are. I will support you in every conceivable way I possibly can and if you do not desire my help, for whatever reason, I will respect your reasons and continue to root from the sidelines.
In regards to those who feel the need to be hateful towards those with mental health issues:
I will not say hateful things to you I will simply tell you that you are wrong. I will try to educate you as to why you are wrong and then, if it gets to a point where I know that you refuse to listen to the truth of science and centuries of learning on the subject, I will wish you well in your life and I will cease communication with you. I am toxic enough for myself, I do not need any help in the matter, thank you.
Lastly, and by no means least:
I have come to a number of crossroads in my life lately and I am so very happy that some of you have been with me in the darkest of the moments that I have walked. You have stopped me from breaking very important promises and if you understand how important that is, then you understand almost everything else.
All my love to all of you,
I will be back soon,